Forgiveness ~

This post was about to be my comment on 

simple thoughts from Paige Knudsen Photography 

She wrote a touching and raw post about Mercy & Grace and I realized that it wasn't right to use her comments section in that way, but that I could post it here.  

Here's what came to my heart in response to her post~

We all will stumble and we all will fall. All of us, every single person. We will do things that we know before we start that we shouldn't and we will do things that afterwards, we realize whether on our own or through another that we messed up, made a bad choice etc. Yes, it is God's mercy and grace that gets us through it all, along with the mercy and grace that others extend to us. Probably because He is using them for just that purpose.

I'll share two times that I've experienced the giving or receiving forgiveness and I saw God's gift of mercy and grace like no other.

One was several years ago. A fairly close friend had an affair and for some reason other friends thought I knew and turned my back, I didn't. I did feel deep in my gut that something was going on and had caught her lying to me, but truly knew nothing. When it all came out I was - well lots of things. My emotions were all over the place, to say angry or mad doesn't do it. I felt used & betrayed and was even ashamed to say I associated with her, in addition to a hatred I felt toward her. I never called her, nor did she call me. But I would think how could she? Why did she choose this path? Why did she lie to me, to others?  Many weeks later at church, our associate pastor {who's so hard to follow} was preaching that day - when it was over {after I managed to hang with'em} I had to call her and apologize to her for the way I handled it. That I had done wrong.  Long and short, a sin is a sin and we are all sinners every single person, not one is less of a sinner than another {this was so hard to swallow - HARD}. There is no sliding scale with God and his rules.  I am no better then her, or anyone else and we were no better than someone sitting in jail for sure guilty by the justice system, we are all sinners. But even with that sin God looks at us all the same, as his child, his creation that he loves abundantly. He is heart broken when we sin, in the same way I find myself upset with my child when they do wrong, yet our love never waivers and neither does his.

Funny thing it really help me become more comfortable in who I was and to care far less what others think of me or my decisions for myself or my family. Someone may want to make feel like less, but I'm not, not in Gods view anyway and that's the most important opinion to me. Everyone has short comings and insecurities, everyone struggles with something. We are all sinners. We each have our own journey and I have no right to judge someone on theirs, when there are flaws in mine.
 

Another and more recent time that comes to mind.  I needed to conduct an interview with some one who also happened to be an old beau. He had dumped me 4 weeks before my senior prom, but our paths had not crossed since. Can we say uncomfortable? Anyway he moved away and had since moved back, and had gotten on with life as had I.  I decided it best not to tell him who I was {since my married name is different} just conduct the interview and be very professional. I learned during the interview that his life had been far from perfect. Some drug use, a major accident that forever changed his life, a failed marriage, and that he was now a christian. We finished the interview, I asked him if he had anything he wanted to add? He said no, that now he wanted to know how I was. He said he knew the minute he saw me and since our first meeting that he knew that he needed to ask for my forgiveness for how he treated me. His body language mirrored the words coming from his mouth, this was sincere and genuine. Just as interesting is the fact that there is a lot of his past that he can't remember due to his accident. But he remembered me, how he treated me and wanted to make it right. My forgiveness was important to him, after all he had gone through, my forgiveness was important. I had forgiven him, long ago, we were kids after all. But it got to me at my core. I came home shared this with my husband {who knew the whole deal before I left for the interview} and for two days I was a complete mess. Why? I didn't do anything wrong. I didn't deny him forgiveness, I had given forgiveness, not received it. I extended grace to him with the forgiveness that he had asked for and was very happy  to give it {although not prepared and in some shock about it}. I didn't need an apology, at least not as far I knew. Still it messed with me for a few days, I would cry just thinking about it all and wonder why.  It did make me think did I owe someone an apology? Did they deserve it, did they need it, were they waiting for it? Did I need to be forgiven? I began working toward that.

Thankfully in the end we are all better for these types of experiences and to see God's mercy and grace up close and personal.

Getting all of the juice I can out of less.

Well so far in 2013 my challenge of less is still that, a challenge.

I have met the challenge of less in the area of finance, I continue to have less money than I need, but I guess we all do. Oh wait; it was suppose to be less debt, not less money. So the pursuit must continue, since there are still several months to go before we bid 2013 ado and I can say farewell to the challenge of less {or re-new it as I'm fearing I might}.

I need to do something to have less, less clutter is one big goal I have. Every room and closet is full. There needs to be less stuff in our home. I want to enjoy space. I want to enjoy time. Not spend my time cleaning up our space and clutter that seems to be everywhere. 

I think the idea of paring down our belongings is hard, our parents and/or grandparents seem to save everything. It's possible that in my father-in-laws' attic are the boxes to everything he ever bought, I'm not kidding. There is also a chance that they still have everything they've ever bought, if it still works, they keep it and even if it doesn't, because it might can be fixed one day. To prove my point, my mother-in-law gave me her juicer last month. I think it's almost as old me, but this is the part that makes it funny, I've been in this family for 19 years and I had never seen it before, ever. But I commented that I wanted a juicer and hated to pay the price for an electric one, the plastic ones I had found seemed flimsy. My mother-in-law pops into the laundry area and comes out with a juicer, there, done, problem solved. She was even reminding my husband about how his dad use to love fresh orange juice. Really? When? Nineteen years and this is the first time I'd ever seen this vintage beauty.

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So let's face it, most of us come from people that hold on to things, you never know when it might be needed. Will I still have this juicer to give my kids? Maybe, it's sweet! But we can't hold on to it all and must shed our homes of some of it. It's just good for us.

How can we ease the clutter problem without a full scale attack on our homes and the stuff we've allowed to penetrate it? I offer a tactic that I've used with good success and a small solution toward having less, at least a little less. I started this about three years ago, right after Santa made his annual trip to our home. I wondered where the haul would go, it was then that this idea was born, on whim, but it has been useful.

My idea is this: pick ten areas of our home and get rid of at least ten items from each of those areas. The kitchen, the pantry, the laundry room, bedrooms, closets, the bookcase in the den, any room or space with stuff qualifies. A few items here and there and I was surprised how fast I found ten items to get rid of, usually I'd find more than ten. After I culled at least ten items from each space I quickly sort them, to donate, sell it or trash it. I almost always find several items worthy of my time to list on ebay and have a nice donation for our local hand up organization.

When I use this method I'm done in about two or three days tops and I'm not working sun up to sun down, just few hours each day, stopping to see to my family as needed. I usually try this at lest twice a year, but may go for three times this year. The best part when I'm done I've just gotten rid of one hundred items from our home, and it wasn't a big job, requiring a lot of time and organization.

The next area to tackle, don't bring new stuff home, but the juicer stays!

The Challenge of Less

New Years Resolutions....Why? What’s the purpose? Who started this anyway? Is it really worth the time and effort? Do they work or do they set us up for failure? Studies show that most people will abandon their resolutions by the end of the 1^st month.  That’s it, 4 weeks is tops for most people. That’s all that they have in them to resolve to change or improve themselves or their lives.  My son even informed me that January 17^th was national give up your New Years’ resolution day...Wow!

I confess that most years I haven’t bothered with a new years resolution, it seemed like a big fuss or hype more than anything else.  However over the last few years I have attempted the one word challenge introduced by a blogger a few years ago. She challenged her readers to pick one word for the new year and apply it to as many areas of your life as possible. This one word is to help define your year, give it direction. You can choose any word but only one, just one word to guide your actions.  Words like hope, light, reflection, rest, renew or beauty, you get the idea. How you apply the word is also up to you. Where do you need hope or beauty in your life?

Seems easy enough, but when you really stop to truly consider which one word would have the most impact or is most needed in your life, choosing becomes difficult. What needs changing or improving in your life or that of your family and how can one word help you get there? What is it that you want the new year to hold and why? Suddenly one word is now pretty important.

After a lot of reflection of how the last year had been my one word presented itself to me and I could not argue, I knew that my one word had found me.

Less.

Yes, Less is my one word for 2013. 

Less stuff, less stress, less debt, less worry,  less of the things and trappings that tie us down. All of this less has me hopeful that our family can have more. More time for each other…more time to relax and enjoy life. Less debt, for more savings and hopefully more opportunities to be spontaneous.  I want less clutter to take care of and clean and more time and energy for our family. Less processed foods and more real foods.  Less take out and more home cooking. Less time with things that take away from our family and more time for each other and the activities that we enjoy or want to try. Less stress and more joy and happiness, more of what's important!

You might even use the old saying that I want quality versus quantity. I'm not looking to lead some minimalist lifestyle with only the bare necessities. Although selling it all could knock out a lot of those at once. I love color and pattern, I can't have or want a bare home.  I do want to love what's in my home, for it to speak to me in some way or in it's way make me happy. That when I pass by it or spy form across the room, a smile comes on my face. Because it has some meaning or reminds me of a special time or person.

I was a historic preservation major in college, so I had lots of designer friends. So often they would tell me about or I was even able to witness them with their clients, a lot of the  clients were trying to achieve a look; I assume in some cases to create an image or even dare say an illusion of the life they want to have or to be believed to have. It's not really them, they may love the style, but none of their true personality is in their home, only the one they want you to think they have. For many there is this need to cover every inch of their home, no blank space, so put something there, anything, everywhere, just don't leave it blank; undone. I know that our home at least in places unintentionally became like those my friends would design for a client, here's the look I want, here's a check when will it be ready? I'll need to get the invitations for our party out soon so everyone can come see it. {No a lie here, I was witness to this more than once}.

I recently discovered a designer the talks about embracing the white space. I think that when you can embrace that, a clam, no frills spot or two, then you can better enjoy the other. I want little white space, I want our "look" to be about our family, not an image of what we might be, but who we really are and what we love. I want to love every aspect of our home and life; not be bogged down by all of the stuff that needs our attention.

In some ways I have already gotten started. I honestly was not in the mood to decorate for Christmas. It really felt more like a chore on the list to cross off instead of part of a wonderful holiday time. I feel certain if I didn’t have young children that kept asking when it would get done and who even helped make it happen; it wouldn’t have. Our tree came home on December 1^st and wasn’t touched until about the 16^th. In addition to the busyness of the holiday and normal activities, my son came down with the flu.
So December 16th was the first time I had the energy to tackle it.  By the time we finished our decorating, I had scaled back what we put up. A little less of everything, but enough to feel like Christmas and enough for the house to seem bare once it was packed and put away.  It really helped me to embrace the idea of less, that less is more.  We enjoyed Christmas every bit as much with fewer decorations and trappings as we have had in the past. We had enough to enjoy the specialness of Christmas and more energy with which to enjoy it. Plus the clean up was faster and less stressful.

It really helped the idea of less seem even more attractive to me.

I’ve chosen a biggie for our family and myself; thankfully I have all year to meet the challenge of less.

Yes, I want less this year, so that we can have more!

Thirty-one Days ~ Day Twentyone - R & R

You've come to learn that on Sundays my post are to review the week and rest up for the new week ahead. Today is no exception. You probably also know that I'm behind in posting.

I won't lie writing for 31 days is hard. Yes, harder than I thought especially since I thought I had chosen a topic that would come easily to me and easy enough to jump back in with. In the beginning I was even a few days ahead in my writing usually by 2 or 3 days but life goes on and stuff happens.

My son got sick with "something" still don't know with what and that's after a trip to the hospital to have x-rays and blood work, all which came back negative or inconclusive...fabulous! He recovered with several days of rest, by the following weekend dear sweet hubby was with sick similar symptoms but still it left us wondering what was going around and who might be next. Guess who was next? Yes, me! Luckily I saw it coming and upped my vitamins, herbs and essential oils, it didn't keep me down too long. Who's got time to be sick anyway?

I've also tried to keep up with a few of the other 31 day blogs, there are so many great ones, but that to can eat up so much of our time. I will direct you soon to some of my favorites for you to find some time to enjoy and learn from.

Throw in the rest of the busyness that life seems to include these days and there you have it...behind.

I'm so very sorry, but I do have every intention of getting these 31 days written. Thanks for hanging in there with me!

Thirty-one Days ~ Day Twenty - Family Time During the Holidays

We like to designate a time or times for our family during Christmas, sounds crazy but if we don’t plan for it ahead of time something or someone else will take it from us. A time just for the four of us, my darling hubby, the two kiddos and myself but this time can be for really whomever you wish to include.

We have a few rules. No shopping or errands, it will include a fun or special treat restaurant for dinner and we all have to agree to where we are going and what we are going to do. It has varied for us almost every year. We have seen the Rockettes, the Nutcraker, we’ve gone to the movies together or simply to look at Christmas lights.  But each year we have enjoyed an activity together. 

Some years it’s been very planned and other years not so much. Since the kids are getting older and their interests are changing, we like to change up what we do. But we are hopeful that whatever we choose that they will remember and cherish the memories and time together.

Whether this is already a tradition for your family or you have never done anything like that before, start looking now. There are lots of great shows or activities to do together, if they require tickets the sooner you decide the better, you don’t want it sell out. Don’t let your ideas only consist of those that will cost money. As I said some of our activities are been simply getting in the car to go look at Christmas lights. We’ve made hot chocolate and had a sing-a-long to Christmas songs in the car as we drove around.

Some other ways to spend time together as a family might be to spread Christmas cheer to others or for some down time together at home; we’ll talk more about that soon.

Thirty-one Days ~ Day Nineteen - Meal Planning

We’ve talked about holiday cooking and baking needs along with cleaning out our pantry, now let’s talk about meal planning during the holidays.

What about your normal everyday meal needs? Start with looking at your calendar. What kind of events will you need to attend, especially during the week when cooking dinner could present more of a challenge than normal? Having a plan in place {if you don’t already} for which meals you’ll eat at home versus out along with what you might serve will help make this a little less stressful. Have you considered preparing some meals to have in the freezer? We’ve cleaned out the freezer, so we’ve got room.

I know I always have the best intentions to eat at home as much as we can. It never seems to fail though that for one reason or another we have to eat out more than I had hoped for, mostly due to poor planning.

How nice would it be to have meals ready to heat and eat?  It would help ensure that you eat at home more which is almost always healthier and cheaper than eating out. Preparing a few casseroles or soups now to pull out later will make life a little easier during the busy Christmas season.

Once you’ve decided on what you will cook and you have the supplies ready, plan a day to cook. Do this before things get busy and your calendar gets full. Make time to prepare meals to have in the freezer ready to cook for your family when you need it.

Most people that I know that prepare meals ahead take a day to do it all at once. Then you only mess up your kitchen once, you’ll do all of your chopping & preparing for several meals in one day. Having just 3 or 4 of these in your freezer could be big lifesavers later.

If by some chance you don’t use these meals you could always give them to someone else in need or use them in January when you want a night off from the kitchen.

If you are planning to include baked goodies as gifts you may want to see if you can prepare any of these ahead of time too and then plan a day to do that, if not then schedule it on your calendar for later.

Thirty-one Days ~ Day Eighteen - Cleaning: The Pantry, Fridge & Freezer

I’m sure you were wondering when I would cover this. I almost did this one during the first week, but decided to wait and here’s why. It will just get messed up again. I know your thinking well of course it will. I’m not ready just yet, as you will see I save the BIG clean ups for later, then its just maintenance cleaning through the holidays. I hope that makes sense. In other words when I go into cleaning mode I want to know that I’ve completed a lot of the messy work already and my cleaning will stick so to speck.

On to cleaning out our pantries, refrigerator and freezers, basically I pull everything out and go through it. While you’re there really clean it, dust or wash the shelves and organize the items when you put them back, grouping items that need to be together are easier to find.

Check to dates and throw out expired items and make note of the items that you are low on {and know you will need}. The best part is that most of these items are plentiful in the stores right now and may even be on sale, most have coupons out there for you to use too.

Earlier we talked about holiday entertaining or baking needs, what recipes will you prepare? If you’ve had the chance to look these needs then you will have better idea of what to look for as you clean out these areas in your kitchen and to help your budget since you will know what you need to replace. Even if you are just taking a dish to a gathering having everything on hand can go a long way in helping you to enjoying a stress free holiday.

Make list of your needs spices, flavorings and basics like flour, sugar and butter along with the other items you see you need to stock up on.

I know in the past I “thought” I had everything only to have run back to the store or send someone to get it for me and hope that they get the right item. Let’s save ourselves from that stress. Take the time to plan and shop ahead and we’ll be ready.

I feel a more enjoyable {and less stressful} Christmas coming, don’t you?

Thirty-one Days ~ Day Seventeen- Crafts or Baking Projects with the Kids

What types of events do you & your families enjoy doing together over the holidays? I know that with the long break the kids can get board. Trust me that statement makes me cringe.  I really don’t remember being board growing up, but I wasn’t use to all of the instant gratification/entertainment that our kids seem to be.

I love the idea of bring kids back down to reality and to appreciate time together that we don’t get enough of with the crazy schedules we keep.  Giving them an opportunity to take a step back in time together, reconnecting to each other as well as creating those memories that they’ll reflect back on one day. Making something with their hands, being creative and learning from the experience.

Past projects for us have including making gingerbread houses, hosting cookie-decorating parties with friends and making ornaments as well as other projects. But as with the recurrent theme here, planning is key to keeping things fun and running smoothly regardless of what activity you plan.

Whether baking or crafting, Pinterest is a wealth of ideas for projects and ideas.  Luckily with most of these a few clicks and you have your supply list and directions ready for your use along with several photos to guide you. Just be realistic about your time & ability, this is meant to be a fun time not the start of something ugly!

Once you decide on what if any projects that you’ll do this year go ahead and add these items to your shopping list and have then ready to use once your ready to use them.

Thirty-one Days ~ Day Sixteen - Gifts for Others

 

Perhaps you covered this when you did your Christmas budget…but just in case you didn’t let’s look at gifts for others.

I’m thinking neighbors, teachers or a gift for a hostess.  As with pretty much every other area some times just taking the time to note the need and have some kind of rough plan will greatly reduce your stress levels.

For me I always seem to forget someone.  It never seems to fail I’m headed to a party and realize that I don’t have a little something for the hostess or the team mom approaches me at practice that we need gifts for the coaches or the kids are going to have a gift exchange…ugh!

So take a few minutes and think of all of the people in your life outside your family & friends that you may need to buy a gift for or might be asked to go in on.

Will you need to contribute money, buy a gift or maybe make or bake gifts?

Know what’s coming and be ready, that can go a long way to reducing your stress and allowing you to enjoy the holiday.

Thirty-one Days~ Day Fifteen - Updating our Christmas card lists

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{sorry I'm behind I've had a sick child all weekend}

Now’s a great time before it gets much busier to update your Christmas card list.

Did any of your friends or family move?  Make a note of it now or call them if need be to have the correct address when the time comes

Has someone on your list passed away? Ok I know that may seem harsh, but my father in-law passed away earlier this year and when my mother-in-law has received some mail addressed to him or the both of them it’s been hard. So be sensitive to anyone on your list that may have lost a spouse.

I guess the same goes for divorce.

Do you need to add anyone new? Do you have any new friends or neighbors? Maybe there has been an addition to the family, nieces or nephews that have recently gotten married and started their own families.

And again maybe you need to remove someone all together?

Take the time to look at your list and update it, in most cases it shouldn’t take to long and it will help you to know how many cards you will need to buy. I just guessed last year and ran short by about 15 cards. So don’t wait, you could even pick up stamps now as well.

Thirty-one Days ~ Day Fourteen - Review and Rest

Here we are at Sunday. For whatever reason this has been a very long week around here. We've made some process, but I still have a lot to do. I know that I need to rest.

I can't believe that two weeks are behind us, we're almost to the half way point. I also hope that you have found some useful tips or inspiration to begin to get ready for the Christmas season and to do so with less stress. Since we've done a lot of planning and prep work...we'll be ready!

Look back over the suggestions and ideas that we've talked about and see what areas still need to be addressed. Decide what you can work on this week and what can wait until later to tackle.

Enjoy a day to rest or maybe visit some of the other 31 Day blogs there are some great ones.

www.thenester.com/2012/09/31-dayers-2012.html

~Also this week we hope to get our Christmas card pictures taken. Still can't decide what the kids should wear???

Thirty-one Days ~ Day Thirteen - Gift-wrap and Batteries

Now let’s move on to an area that I’m always aware of but still seem to forget.

Batteries, tape, gift-wrap, gift-bags, boxes, ribbons and bows.  No, I don’t forget all or every part of it. But I do seem to over look one or two of these. Maybe I get gift-warp but need bows and boxes. Have batteries but not enough or the have the wrong size.

So today is kind of an easy one. Make a point to look at what you may have on hand and add what you need to your list of supplies to pick up, maybe you can even catch some sales and save money too.

I hope these reminders are helping you to begin to think now about what you need or will need to do and by doing a little at a time we’ll all enjoy a Christmas with less stress.

Thirty-one Days ~ Day Twelve - Holiday Entertaining Part II

Continuing with the mindset of entertaining lets looks at our supplies.

Take time to look at your china or Christmas dishes and other plates or platters that you would use for parties or other entertaining events.  This will help you avoid discovering a crack or chip in something the day of your event and if you do see you if need something, you'll have the time to take care of it.

What about your linens? Do you have the right sizes? Are they in need of replacing? Do they need to be cleaned or pressed before your party? What about napkins or other paper products? 

What about candles and candlesticks?  See what you have versus what you will want to use. I know that red and white candles are always the first colors to sell out at the stores.  Checking on this now will ensure that you have the sizes and colors you want. 

What types of centerpieces will you have? Do you have a piece you pull out every year? If so then you may have already checked on this, if not take a look at it. How does it look? Do you like a fresh arrangement? You may want to begin to plan this and even speak with a florist.

Take a day to check these items so that you can take care of them ahead of time and not have any surprises at the last minute.

Thirty-one Days ~ Day Eleven - Holiday Entertaining

What if any entertaining will you do this year?

In the past we have hosted a small party of 8 to 10 couples for a White Elephant party. This has always been a fun party that we all look forward to each year. Then for the last five years we have hosted Christmas dinner for my husbands family and mine. This usually includes a late lunch for around 20 or more.

If you are hosting, preparations ahead of time are huge to pulling this off and keeping your stress levels low. I enjoy a decorated house, but I have so much on my plate that I think I could pass on it most days. Having company gives me the motivation and deadline I need to get things done.

There’s a lot more to consider. Date, time, theme and maybe even location in addition to a guest list and invitations to prepare are just a few of the decisions you will need to make. You’ll need to plan a menu along with deciding who or how this food will be prepared. Will you need childcare for any of your entertaining, if so book it as soon as you have your date set? What will you wear?

Sit down with a calendar and a note pad. Write down what needs to be done and make notes of the days and dates to have these completed. Just having a rough plan can go a long way towards reducing the stress that some can experience from hosting friends and family during the holidays.

Also keep in mind that less can be more, most people aren't as concerned or critical about the details as we are as the hostess. Most of my family are relieved to have the hostess duties taken care of by someone else and are glad to bring a dish.

Again the best and most important tip here is to have a plan of what you are doing, what you need and time planned to make it all come together.  A lot of what we’ve already talked about as well as some of our remaining topics will help us to cover many of the aspects that go along with preparing for the Christmas season as well as entertaining; hopefully doing so with less stress.

Thirty-one Days~ Day Ten - Taking Inventory

If you haven’t already it’s time to plan a day to go to the attic or basement and look at your Christmas decorations.

Check your lights, do you have any that have burned out?  What about your other decorations are they tired looking?  I use some artificial garland outside and some of mine looks really sad, so I know that I need to get a few pieces.

Bows don’t always fair well when being stored and ribbon can be expensive and hard to find after a few years. You may need time to find these and try to catch sales too.

Will you have a real tree or an artificial one? For a real tree, make sure you added it to your budget and if you use an artificial this is a good time to check it, along with wreaths and any other decorations or ornaments that you have. Make sure you don’t have any broken pieces, by checking these now you will have time to try and repair or replace them if possible. 

What about stockings, have you had an addition to your family, they will need a stocking. Shop early will help ensure more selection.

To sum it all up~

I think that the biggest tip here is to know what needs you have and include them in your budget. When you take care of these early you will have a better selection to choose from and the time to do some comparison-shopping to hopefully save you a few dollars in the process.   

Taking some time now will save you from stress and headaches latter.

Thirty-one Days~ Day Nine - Homemade Holidays

           

I thought that we needed to address this as soon as we could. Will make any of your Christmas gifts?

I’m not the craftiest person I wish I were. But I do have plans to “make” a few of our Christmas gifts. I have in the works a DVD for my husband of some photos and hope to make a photo book for grandparents.

My husband lost his dad this year and they were very close. So I want to get any photos that we have saved before anything happens to them.

These projects can take time & some thought. In addition I have to factor in print & shipping time with the photo book site. This is a pretty popular gift this time of year so I need to allow time to “get in line” at some point in the production of my books. Not to mention that I have other jobs and responsibilities that I have to take of. Thankfully the book for the grandparents will be the same book.

Decide on what gifts you will make this year, evening baking. Begin to think of whom you will give gifts to. How many you will need to make or what recipes you will prepare? What supplies will you need, what are your budget restraints, how much time will you need to complete your gifts?

Answering these questions will help you to be aware of your time and needs to formulate a plan to make some of your Christmas gifts. Hopefully you can even shop sales for your supplies if you have a good idea of what you will need.

If you’re making gifts plan a time to work on it and depending on how involved your gifts are to make, set a day or days (another appointment for yourself basically) or certain hours of the day to work to complete these projects and get them ready. But enjoy the process and reward of giving a gift with real thought for whoever receives it.

Thirty-one Days ~ Day Eight - Christmas Budget

This is pretty important area, money. I hate the words budget and limits but we need accountability plain and simple {or maybe it’s just me}. This is an area that I have seldom had a lot of success but am hopeful that this year can be different.

If you don’t have a budget now is the time to establish one. Nothing can ruin Christmas as fast as realizing that you’ve spent too much money.

Begin by determining your spending limits.

Be realistic if you aren’t paying with cash you will have credit card bills come January.  Maybe you can review last years spending. Really stop to consider all of your holiday spending needs. Don’t ignore gifts you are sharing the cost of with others like classmates or family.

A homemade gift or store bought?

When you are budgeting remember money for supplies for gifts you will make as well as gifts of money. This will allow you to better shop sales for gifts or supplies to make gifts.

You may also need to factor in other expenses into your budget like entertaining costs, babysitters, food, decorations, Christmas cards, postage or shipping cost and family outings i.e. tickets to shows maybe. Will you need to factor in any travel costs? ~ We will talk more about some of these areas a bit later in our 31 days.

Next create your list. Who will you be buying for?

Family, friends, neighbors, teachers, hostess gifts and any other gift needs you may have. Don’t forget gifts for people that help you throughout the year like babysitters. The sooner you identify who is on your list the sooner you can begin to plan. How much will you spend for each gift? By doing this you will be less likely to forget someone and have to rush out to buy something and risk over spending or giving a gift you really don’t like. This will also help you take advantage of sales when you know what you are looking for and what you can afford to spend. Will you be going in on some gifts with someone else? My children are on a gymnastic team and we go in with teammates for our coaches’ gifts, but I always seem to forget to add this one in.  

We have a few couple friends that we use to exchange gifts with, now we go out to a nice dinner together and catch up, no gifts just time for each other. Yes we are still spending money, but there is no stress of shopping and dealing with malls and all that comes with them; we’re creating memories and strengthening our relationships.

Every year I try and pretty much every year I fail to stick to my budget. In my defense our sons birthday is December 28^th so I’m buying for both and tend to forget that some of what I’m buying is for his birthday, so I go get more for my daughter, to balance it out. It’s a vicious cycle and I one I’ve repeated often.

One area that we do get some relief in is family gifts. Several years ago money was very tight and our families decided to forgo gifts for the adults and only buy for the kids, our nieces & nephews.  Then we would stretch our money by getting a gift for our parents together or giving gifts like current photos or photo books of the kids. We have kept that tradition; it means fewer gifts to buy and less stress in the shopping and money department.

Also look at what or how you have bought for your family and friends in the past. Do you go overboard? Why? I would take a good look at that and see if you need to improve in this area.

In the past we have gone above and beyond for our kids, but in recent years we have tried to scale back. They now are allowed to ask for 5 things with the knowledge that they may or may not get all of them. Almost always there is a gift we can’t afford, don’t want them to have or it’s sold out. We usually aim to get 2 or 3 of the 5 gifts they have asked for and then add 1 or 2 items that we want them to have so there is some surprise to Christmas morning.

Do you have a gift closet {I had never heard of this until my mother-in-law}? If so start there. You may have some great deals you picked up months ago just sitting there. These could save you time & money. You could use these as your hostess gifts or your “just in case” gift for someone. Avoid impulse shopping if at all possible and when you have completed your list STOP. Don’t go shopping, don’t surf the web and maybe even throw out the catalogs or at least put them up.

Find a way to keep yourself on track with these perhaps some kind of computer program, app, spreadsheet or even just a notebook is better than nothing. Devise a way to keep up with your receipts, you may need to return an item or activate a warranty. This will also help you with planning next year. When you have a plan and have taken the time to budget for these you’ll be less likely you blow your budget and be depressed when bills begin to roll in in January. It’s just not worth the extra stress.

Remember above all else, Christmas isn’t about more, how much more can you spend or do. It’s not about the all of the ideas & stuff that the stores want to sell you. It’s about the birth of Christ. Give your family time not stuff and money. We try harder each year for it to be more about being with each other than what we can give each other. Creating memories and traditions over adding to our debt or our clutter.  Give gifts of love and kindness where and when you can. 

Thirty-one Days ~ Day Seven - A Little R & R

A little Review and Rest since day seven is a Sunday, I want us to spend more time with our families than with the 31 days. Let's take a few minutes and look back at all of the suggestions from this past week. I know that you may not need all of these. But of the ones that you did, which areas were you able to tackle and which ones still need your attention?

Did you decide on your Christmas cards?

Is there a DIY project on your to do list {or one that needs to be packed up until next year}?

Did you identify what areas outside your home need attention before winter gets here?

Was there anyone that needed a doctor’s appointment?

What about travel plans or offering to help a friend while they are away?

I know I’ve still got several items to work on, but I have a good start. This weekend we worked in our yard {it's more work than I realized -whew! not done yet but we've started}. Make time to look at these next week and work towards marking them off of your to do list, we have lots more to cover next week.

Thank you so much for coming and hanging out with me. I know if we have a plan and work on it a little each day, we’ll be have so much completed that we can all enjoy a stress free Christmas.

Take some time today to enjoy some of the other 31Day bloggers post. There are so many interesting topics to explore.

www.thenester.com/2012/09/31-dayers-2012.html

Thiry-One Days ~ Day Six - Holiday Travel Needs

In keeping with the planning aspect of holiday preparations, will your Christmas plans have you traveling?

Now is a good time to get the details set, confirmed or get the ball rolling if you haven’t even begun.

Will your travel plans include…Air travel, Hotels, Car rental or airport shuttles?

Making and confirming schedules and reservations now could save you from headaches later.

What about your mail or your plants?

Will you need a house sitter or pet care while you are away?

Will you need to do any shopping to get ready to travel?

Will you need to ship any gifts ahead of time?

Check your luggage is it in good shape? What about prefilled travel size bottles of your favorite products or an empty set to fill with your own products? Get these ready now.

Take the time now to not just acknowledge these needs, but begin working on them.  You have the opportunity to greatly reduce confusion or other problems that can arise and therefore reduce your stress.

If you are lucky enough to stay home you may not need these tips. But do you have a friend or neighbor you know will be traveling? Could they use some help with these needs? A ride to the airport or their home watched and the mail brought in, you see where I’m going I think. What a great gift to give to someone during the holidays and it shouldn’t cost you anything and be of great help to them. What a great way to extend Christ’s love to another.

Now that this is on your mind it’s a great time to get your travel plans set and confirmed so that you don’t have to worry about it later

Thirty-One Days ~ Day Five -Sprucing Up Our Exteriors

Depending on where you live time could be a big factor in you ability to complete this task. So before any more of our precious time gets away let’s talk about sprucing up outside before winter hits.           

Do you need to have your gutters cleaned?

What about your windows?

Are there weeds in your flowerbeds?

Do you have bushes or trees that need trimming?

What do you need to get your home’s exterior ready not only for Christmas decorating, but also for winter?

The days are getting shorter and the temperatures’ are beginning to drop a little. So before your time to work is limited by conditions take stock of what needs to be done outside and get that plan ready…I warned you that this week one was full of plans.  

And trust me that as I write this, the to do list around here is growing.  Here’s what I have so far for our house.

We need to add mulch to our beds and deadhead some flowers. I have some pressure washing that needs to be done before cold weather makes itself at home. We need to clean out the gutters and washing at least a few windows {I’m not going over board on that one} mostly to get rid of cobwebs and other trash that have made a home on my windowsills.

There are several items that despite finding or making them a home last spring are still somehow lying around in the garage, along with some other odds & end picking up outside.

Here’s a few more tips sent to me by a home repair company not to long ago.

~Clean out gutters and downspouts. Inspecting gutters and downspouts for debris and fallen leaves can reduce the chances of an ice dam forming. An ice dam can cause leaks that will result in interior damage to your ceilings and walls. After you've cleared as many leaves as you can from your gutters, you can spray water down the downspouts to wash away any other debris. Gutter screens can help reduce the number of leaves that collect in your gutters. Exercise extreme caution when working on a ladder or on the roof.

~Run all gas-powered lawn equipment until the fuel tank is empty or discard of it properly. Gasoline left in the tank loses its volatile components over the winter, making your mower hard to start in the spring. By draining the tank, you are also removing flammable liquid storage from your garage. Make sure you aren't storing dirty, oily rags in a pile. They can ignite spontaneously.

~Prepare your furnace for the upcoming heating season. Consider calling a reputable local heating and cooling company to check your furnace, clean it, and prepare it for the upcoming winter. Keeping the furnace in good working condition will help reduce your heating bills and help avoid serious problems.

~Replace or clean your furnace filter. This will keep the air in your house cleaner, make your furnace more efficient, and help lower your heating bills

Are you asking what this has to do with Christmas preparations? Trying to get a repair man/company to our homes during Christmas can be difficult. Hopefully by checking on these now you can avoid some of these repairs, which can be costly...and have less stress not just during Christmas, but maybe all winter too!